I Made It?

My first year of teaching is over. Sometimes I feel like I just blacked out for the whole thing, but this blog has been a pretty jarring reminder. In all honesty though, it has been an amazing year. The purpose of this blog is to show the lighter side of my job. Although many of these chaotic things do not feel light while they are happening, they can certainly manifest into that form after the fact. Additionally, writing this stuff down has been a way for me to almost maintain my sanity. This is a difficult job. Without certain kinds of outlets one could begin to slip.

I truly am so proud of everything my students have done this year. The progression from hiding under tables, throwing random objects, fighting, constant threats, etc. to being able to make the growth they have in reading levels, math mastery, and more has been incredible to say the least. Are we where we need to be? No, but I know that the foundation has been laid and the importance of education has been revealed.

I will be welcoming several new teachers to my school next year, and am very excited to see the achievement I know awaits us. I will be teaching 3rd grade instead of 5th. Fortunately my old students are just a stone's throw away. Please join me next year if you finna get down with some more roasting and teachable quotes fun. Thanks for reading...see ya in the fall!

Skin Pigment

The last day of school consisted of going to a park. As such, I was wearing shorts for the first time all year. This was a major event for my students. We enter...

B: "Hey y'all, look at Mr. A's legs!"

A: "Ooooh, you need some lotion real bad Mr. A."

Mr. A: "Why do you say that?"

A: "Cause you be all ashy."

B: "Yeah Mr. A, that's the worst ash I ever seen cuz."

Mr. A: "That's not ash, that's the color of my skin."

A: "But it's so white. If you put some lotion on that mug you could probably get rid of some of that."

Mr. A: "Well it's not really possible to get rid of my skin pigment simply by applying lotion."

B: "Pigment? Mr. A you ain't finna start teaching us something right now on the last day of school when we ready to leave are you?"

Mr. A: "Life is just one big lesson B, but no, we have to board the bus now, so we'll just do a mini-lesson on the bus...you can sit next to me."

D: "Ha, B just got juiced by Mr. A."

Mr. A: "That's what I'm here for, just juicing to the end."

Personification

The students are all in the cafeteria for breakfast. As much as they pretend to not like me, they consistently crowd around the table where I sit each morning. P, a seventh grader, has noticed that some of the students have different bowls for their cereal than is typically the norm. It appears they had run out of the standard bowls and so they were using what looked liked disposable Tupperware. This excited P. We enter...

P: "Oooh, look at them bowls y'all got."

J: "Yeah, these is boosey man. They be all big and stupid looking."

Mr. A: "It's just a bowl, I feel like you're analyzing this too much."

P: "Yeah but Mr. A, look at them mugs!"

Mr. A: "No, I know. I see them. I guess I'm just not as perplexed by them as you are."

P: "Y'all look like homeless people eating out them dusty ass mugs. Them bowls is LD!"

Mr. A: "Well P, a bowl can't really take on the human characteristic of living with a learning disability. Well, I suppose in the literature arena it could, thus being referred to as personification."

P: "Huh? No one knows what that means Mr. A. All I'm saying is them bowls is LD Cuz, and all y'all look like homeless people eating from them."

Mr. A: "Note to self, stronger emphasis on literary terms for next year."