Technicalities

On their way into class from gym, T proceeds to tell me that J shoved her into the wall. I summon J to ask her about the incident. We enter...

Mr. A: "OK J, tell me what happened in the hallway."

J: "Mr. A, I didn't do nuthin, whatever that dusty girl said is a lie."

Mr. A: "Well, you don't know what she said, so how do you know it's a lie."

J: "Cause she dusty."

Mr. A: "Well, that doesn't really work in this situation, but I did hear that you pushed her into the wall."

J: "What? Oh hell no, how she gonna lie on me like that, I didn't push her."

Mr. A: "You didn't put your hands on her?"

J: "I mean I pushed her, but it wasn't technically a push. I just pushed her with my hands."

Mr. A: "Hm, OK, well a push is with your hands...so, technically you did push her."

J: "Whatever, you triflin' Mr. A."